Friday, May 1, 2015

"You're Really Pretty for a Dark Skin Girl" (Pretty Hurts...?)



                                                     BISH WHET???

If I have another person approaches me and say, "You know, you're really pretty for a Dark Skin Girl..." one more time I may snap. I may. I. Just. May. I don't know what exactly I'll say or if it'll be comprehensible, let alone appropriate, BUT I just may snap on the next person who makes that sort of comment without thinking.
What provokes people to say something like that? What words, in the comment, makes the statement seem as if the person on the receiving end will take it as a compliment? I mean, are people expecting to get a big "THANKS" from such a back-handed compliment? NO. Not 'compliment'. Nothing about that is a compliment. I mean what? What are people expecting Dark-skinned women to say?
             'Oh Thank you! I've never been a huge fan of my skin complexion or anyone else who looks similar to me. It's such a relief that there is hope for me to be Beautiful.'
 
BISH WHET??? 
 
 
 
First off...
Why can't the compliment just stop after "You're Really Pretty."??? Hmm? Why? Saying <-- that statement alone is a compliment in itself. There's no need to add, "...for a Dark Skin Girl", "...for a Girl with thick lips", "...for a Pale White Chick" at the end. There should already be a moral message engraved into your small brain that ALL women of ALL shapes and sizes are Beautiful. ALL of us! So by saying, "For a Dark Skin Girl" (Which brings me to my 'Second off' stage) after a compliment such as "You're really Pretty..." or "You wear that color well..." implies that most to all Dark skinned women/girls are unattractive. I mean, really, what's so unappealing about the Dark Skinned Sista? What?
Is it our thick, full lips that won't leave you hangin when you kiss us?
Is it our  volumptuous, never-ending, curves that drive men AND women of ALL ethnicities crazy? Got'em wondering like, "Damn! How's she wearing them jeans though???"
Is it the way we sway when we walk? Holding on to that inner strength that only a "Dark-Skinned" woman would understand?
Is it the confidence in our smile?
Is it the way our dark skin mimics the night-time sky? And reminds you of calm, warm, deep Carribean air?
Is it our thick dark hair and big brown eyes that drown you in truth???
Or is it the fact that there is not only ONE type of 'Dark-Skinned' Wo-man? There are hundreds of shades of the Dark Skin woman. From Chocolate, to Cocoa, to Deep Mahogany, Ebony...etc.
 
OR
 
      Maybe it has nothing to do with how we look. Maybe people can't get around our looks because they are too into our personalities. They're like, "DAMN...Why they gotta have strong personalities AND look DAMN good?" We're just strong all around. Different women go through different experiences. Women involved in their own specific racial group also experience behaviors and situations in life that others wouldn't understand. And most of the time those experiences change and mold our personalities; and yes, Women of different Races do INDEED have different personalities. For Dark-skin women, we see the world as against us. If the Dark Skin woman gets praised in any sort of positive light. by others outside of her "image", she gets praised for how much other women want to look like her. Women these days want to plump their lips to achieve a thicker, fuller lip size. Women are going out of their way to get butt injections to lift and plump up their rear ends to look like the butt of a dark-skin woman who was born with her shape and curves. Women are killing themselves- and their pocket books- on tanning beds and on hot hot beaches to receive darker-skin tones for "Summer Looks".
      If Dark Skin women aren't being praised for her miniscule attributes that everyone ELSE wants, then she's being looked down upon. Not only by people outside of her race but also by the ones within. Black women (black people in general) have a bad reputation of having BAD attitudes or unapproachable personalities. However, the hate that Darker skinned women (and men I don't ever feel right leaving the Dark Brothas out of these types of rants, seeing as they experience this type of hate too; but for now it's about the ladies) receive from her fellow black people are down right stupid. No other word for it. Just STUPID. For real. We, as black people, should already be supporting one another and building each other up; we should be standing and uniting together against all who stand against US. However, there are still some ignorant Black folks who continuously put their fellow brother or sister down. How do you think the Darker skinned woman feels when people of her race are looking at her saying things like, "You're too dark to wear that pink color. Only light girls can wear that color." or  (when Black girls get relaxers) "You have white-people hair..." or  "Look at your big ole chunky lips! Those lips could hide yo face!!! You look like a Monkey" (<-- Which I got all through Grade-school I don't remember how many times) or "You need to comb out your KNAPPY hair!!!" or "You have pretty hair for a dark black girl." or (The topic of the Day; the infamous one) "You're really pretty for a Dark Skin Girl.".

      

        Has the "MAN" put us, as a race, down so much that we don't view each other and ourselves as attractive??? We were KINGS and QUEENS! We ARE KINGS and QUEENS! We should be treated as such and we should treat each other as such. We come from a kingdom and History of Royalty. There is no reason we should think ourselves to be just as attractive as the next race.
I'm equally confused...I mean.
Is it our sassy personalities? Is it the wall we've put up due to harassment from those around us that make us seem unappealing? I've been told, "the Darker the Berry, the sweeter the juice!". We all have our own flavor and we all know what kind of flavor we like.
BUT...
Everyone loves chocolate sweetie. Some may think it's too sweet and some may think it's too thick but at the end of the day there's a type of chocolate for EVERYONE.
Ya'll know you like it.
Ya'll know you see it.
Ya'll know you wanna be ALL. UP. IN. IT.
Dark Women are BEAUTIFUL. CLASSY. STRONG. INDEPENDENT. SASSY. AND SWEET!!!

Come get some of this juice hunty...



Peace and Love,

<3 Ms. Avery Baby

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